selected tweets, prose & an interview with theo thimo

tweets (@theoooeooo)

1.
Whatever I’m feeling is just underlying the infinite and infinite love I have for my fellow human beings
In which the clouds are paintings
All I experience is pleasure
I feel like I’m dancing w myself when I take a selfie
Life never ends
Why do I feel so wonderful? Because I can
omg the day is breathtaking so beautiful sky w trees and warm air that blows riding in an uber in love and my whole life and everything
I do my thing, you probably do yours
The world needs my poetry as much as I do
All the warmth I need is given freely by the sun and air
Every breath is a blessing probably who cares
Whoever I owe my life to, thank you
Even lying on the grass, I can’t help but give it my best
Why isn’t everything good?
The warm sun, the cool ground, somewhere in between I lie around

2.
Im buying a sandwich!
Happy theo! Happy theo!
Happy theo!
Happy theo happy happy theo!
Happy happy theo!
Tbh im fucking drunk we All hel
Oin yjr. Eyjrrroom mekiy tpuusrimj tikw
Too drunke
Fewatj:-
Sjckz

3.
I want to live in a song
waking up feels like getting hit by a truck
I forgot im on drugs lol
Im just talking to myself in my room
I forgot my body exists
it feels like i just accidently started doing things today
maybe i feel naseuous i cant tell
Im just going to sit in the bathroom for an hour
i think im just trying to make something on google docs
at this point im just assuming people are interacting with me online
was i supposed to do things today
i forgot that twitter has like feeds of other people saying things
not interested
Im sick like a dog whos made of art and i feel love
Im so just not interested in being sober and not being online all the time
I feel invested in my self
Like i keep buying things and it feels like investing lol
feels beautiful, etc.
accidently am feeling good right now lol
the kind of existence where i dont kno i exist is very appealing
my typos r v aesthetically pleasing
I want every person to be girls except me
Enjoying the day is so nice
Lol at being happy
Being outside and not hating myself seems ideal

4.
life is a flower
life is being happy and working hard
kept thinking, "I can't believe Theo," and laughed
very me today
jesus christ my life omg
what color is the internet?
I put my face near a squirrels face and i angrily whispered, kiss me kiss me u wild animal
the weather feels like how I feel
I want to be late for work today
is my life over? I'm 19
people to do drugs with on the internet
had a dream about kissing but I forgot who I was kissing
when ppl try at anything it seems so beautiful that I start to cry
just trying at something takes the most energy imagineable, it seems other worldly
I want to wear a stylish dress and walk a small dog in the summer time

5.
smoking a cigarette lying in the sun
can't feel more like a poet than tweeting on a beautiful day like today
fav ur friends tweets
retweet that thing u like
life is too short
love stuff in general
who even needs something to do
can't help but see the beauty filled in everything
appreciate being able to tell u guys this
love expressing things
feel too in love to care about dying
surprised by how much I am

​​omg the day is breathtaking so beautiful sky w
trees and warm air that blows riding in an uber in
​love and my whole life and everything

Me and Ceil have been waiting in line for cookies for
what feels like thirty minutes.
​
Nearly our turn to enter the interior of the cookie shop,
we find ourselves deeply engrossed in a conversation
about our early experiences with masturbation.

“I'm tired of reminiscing about the past,” I say, “isn't it
about time I start doing something worthwhile?”

The cookies cost us five dollars each and are notably
small.

“I remember when my tarantula died,” Ceil says, “I didn’t
even really care, I was just like bye.”

“What even is spirituality?” I ask, “Is it like being a
Democrat?”

“I mean, I prayed when I was a kid,” she says, “and I
was like, okay but this is kind of weird.”

That night I dream, like always, of friends who are far
but not when we kiss, only to wake up twenty minutes
late for work.

I throw on some clothes, step out of my homely,
windowless apartment, and am literally blinded by the
sun.

I cover my eyes and groan towards the great, and
indifferent sky.

My life, in a daze, or in love, or whatever with the sun,
always waiting like me in the clouds for some date, or
friend, a text, something, anything, hello!

On my merry way to work, I relish a lil in my existence,
thinking about my life and its various accomplishments.

I couldn't've picked a better place to fuck off the past 3
years than what could be the busiest city in America.

It’s spring now and smells feel everywhere.

I make a quick stop by the usual spot for a bagel where I
spot Doris munching away at a croissant.

“Much has changed,” she says, “as I’m sure you can
imagine,” referencing her toxic ex-boyfriend we were
once acquainted through.

I attempt to purchase goods and services from the
barista before concluding I’ve left my wallet at home.

Doris and the barista now seem to believe, albeit
accurately, that I have no money.

Rushing back home, I’m greeted by my roommate’s
cats, who, like gifts, occasionally enter with small gifts
into my bedroom.

How quickly these little ones appeared in my life and
became my best friends.

Maybe this is spirituality, not what I think about, but how
what I think about makes me do the things I do.

I bounce back on my feet, eager to experience most
stimuli, feeling trapped in this world as grateful to receive
as I am to relay.

There are numerous things outside of this room, all with
the potential to change in wilder and fantastic variations
over distance and time.

Falling down the stairs, my temple makes impact with
the handrail, and I can’t help but wonder if all this is just
​part of some big, mysterious plan made up just for me.

interview

1. okay, most obviously, is "omg the day is breathtaking so beautiful sky w trees and warm air that blows riding in an uber in love and my whole life and everything" a true story?

hi, yes, it's true in the sense that everything in it happened irl and I wrote it with the intention of relaying a truthful account of events.  feel semi-unconsciously aware of the story being fictional but seems only negligibly so, i assume.  maybe because it's dealing with events that took place maybe a month ago now and probably as time passes the story will maybe start to feel more fictional to me.  the only way writing could seem true is if it were more of a transcript or document being made in real time, or closer to the moment maybe like a video camera or regular camera

2. we looked you up on the internet and know you live in brooklyn.  how do you like it?

i have been here maybe 3 years, maybe during that time i've been cumulatively unemployed for about a year, probably had close to a dozen jobs,  right now i live in a place in bedstuy off bedford - the neigbhorhood is exponentially gentrifying, all our neighbors are getting kicked out or their rents increased.  my landlord and his boyfriend are worried we'll get kicked out by the guy in the position above landlord (police lol?) bc this place is v old and crumbling.  anyway, it's a very nice place.  i like it here.

3. why is using language/abbreviations ("internet speak" or whatever) specific to the younger generations important in modern writing?

always interesting to me how technology is having a dialogue with our language similarly to how culture affects slang.  wonder how specific text digitally replicating itself onto many different screens changes people's experience in reading the text,  as a child, looking at the word "dog," being unable to read, and attempting to visually illustrate a dog using the letters.  feel like written word is maybe, in some way, closer to how a computer would understand an image as the environment in which we're exposed to text changes, as well with the tools in which we interact w text changes, people are going to find inspiration in this new relationship, and in some way identify w it probably

4. you seem like you take a lot of time to appreciate everything.  that's really nice.  what are some things you're really appreciating right now?

it's really the only thing i'm good at.  i'm not really appreciating anything right now, except maybe appreciating the mental energy it is taking to answer these questions in an honest/unpretentious way and perhaps failing.  i think ur questions assumes that i appreciate life in more general sense, which idk is the case.  i can not atm think of a time in which i was appreciative or happy in general with my life.  maybe i have felt that way before but for probably momentary periods of time that probably diminished quickly enough for me to dismiss them.

5. on the contrary, what's the unhappiest you can remember being and what made you that way?

almost killing myself bc of losing gf/apartment/job a couple years ago.

6. what are your thoughts about gender and feminism?

not that it seems to matter, i remember reading a tweet that went something like, "everyone is [doing something] man vs girl, and i'm just [nonbinary],"  the tweet felt v much like home to me atm, but being amab (assigned male at birth) and not trying to go thru the daily process of subverting it in the specific binary, feminine way, seems to make me a man.  it seems really stupid but that seems to be my current experience as a nb person.  not speaking for all nonbinary/agender persons but feel a good portion of feminism doesn't treat our identities as viable,  at least not as viable as being a man or woman.  maybe they see it as more of a nondescript "questioning" label, i'm not sure.  in the end, it has always seemed, people, whether they care about the binary or not, just don't want to be confused by the way you look, and what pronoun to call u lol.  generally offended by ppl determined in determining one's pronouns.  not to say all identifying feminists aren't actually super aware and care about the nuances of gender,  but from the reactions received when i've decided to identify as agender/nonbinary to ppl i assumed to be feminists,  as well as being completely out of the topic of mainstream transgender/feminism conversation,  there's a lot of language that's invalidating to nb ppl, I feel, though can't come up w any atm.  seems funny, bc i've never been more confident of my own sexuality/gender, and yet both seem met w some skepticism from a surprising, to me, amount of ppl.  in terms of healthy living, i'd rather be a drug user than a man.
uhm, but here's why feminism is important:
1. feminism probably helped me find a better version of myself
2. it put an ideological lens over society that seems to more accurately reflect reality for me
3. literally everyone is racist and sexist it seems

7. how do you feel about academia in the lit community?
​
i feel like there is a culture of academia in writing, although it doesn't seem relatively as severe as in other communities,  i would be more worried about communities that are more dependent on institutions.  independent publishers seem given an adequate (maybe not?) amount of respect, if not more excitement for their releases.  i am only talking from personal experience though. maybe some ppl only get super excited about penguin os.  i dropped out of college and don't feel as ostracized from the lit community as i do other communities.

8. are your tweets a dialogue of your thoughts and, if so, do you filter any out? 

i would say the tweets are a good representation of my day to day thoughts and outlook on life, but are, relative to the amount of thoughts i have on a day-to-day basis, extremely filtered to what are hopefully the best.  i try my best to not publicly say any racist or sexist thoughts i have, and to try and correct those thoughts, usually by repeating the "no, no, racist/sexist, bad, no".  i also filter most suicidal ideation i have, and try not to say too many worrisome things in a short period of time otherwise ppl start messaging me.

9.  in consideration of the fact that when we die, parts of us will live on through the internet, how do you think your tweets would influence a stranger's thoughts about themselves or you in the distant future?​

a person reading my tweets in the future would probably be able to relate to an uninteresting, for them, degree, and would mostly view my outlook on life to be some sort of unmatured philosophical ambivalence that hopefully their culture has corrected in mainstream thought by then.

8. tell us three secrets (please).

unsure what secrets are
we didn't invite a couple coworkers to the christmas party, that was supposed to be a secret
my roommate doesn't like it when i tell ppl he's starting a business
sometimes all the good feelings i have for someone feel like secrets

​✱✱✱

Theo Thimo is an Albanian American poet/writer
​based in Brooklyn, NY. @theoooeooo