THE LIGHTBULB CONSPIRACY BY ALEXIS SIKORSKY
we were astronauts and
beekeepers; archaeologists and mechanics; overseas teachers getting drunk off communion wine in a theocratic country with no believers. I was the blowhole in a whale and the trash heap at sea I was a groundbreaking invention hidden under planned obsolescence you were the vitamin C I took daily and the cold I caught anyway you were a ferris wheel showing a child the world at the top we were forks coming off of screaming rivers and diving into sidewalks holding handprints that weren't ours throwing rotten eggs into ditches because what else would we do with them and what else was there to do? I filled a cracked bucket with jell-o and left it on your porch because I knew you'd know what I meant you painted a face around the hole I punched through the wall because you knew I'd send a picture to my mom we recited mournful monologues on the bruises in our bananas we played pianos with our toes we pinched the sun between our fingers we were lost. we weren't alone. FLUX (POEM) BY ALEXIS SIKORSKI/ INSTERSTELLAR ROMANCE (ALBUM) BY SEAN BURNETTE
1
this is the day before. I kicked a sock off while I was sleeping. stood by the door, several doors, and I did not leave the house. 2 it was the green shirt from yesterday oversized load- ing like this truck stopping traffic in the dead of nowhere when I expected to be going fast 3 there it is. an expectation, rightly so-- but I can't help thinking if I blink it'll disappear. 4 or I'll disappear. employing cryptic coloration when no one employs me. but there it is. so there I go. so here I go. go. Go, omg, GO. 5 this is the closest I'll get to no man's land, and I'm proud to say I'm terribly impatient. 6 the song you'd play at 00:00 sunglasses and a scarf out the window but you still have your breath and a mission, an appointment: with the end of the world and you're ready, you're so ready 7 but now you don't know what to think. I don't know what to think. I don't know, but maybe I'll find soon, I do. if you do. fucking threw off my plan, you did. (as if I'd ever had one) 8 God, I'm acting like a stereotype. if I'm the thinker, I'd better get going now. 9 it's best to travel with strangers-- they're not strangers by the end. but then give it one week post- and you'll be strangers again. 10 I don't know how to work a pay phone but I'm out of service and so is my ride. can't talk, 11 was hanging off the back of a bus. am I supposed to be stability? this land is at too much of a slant. like, I'm rolling down this hill right now; he said he'd meet me at the bottom. 12 but did he? it was like when this kid said I couldn't climb, so I went up the tree in his backyard and bridged it over to the roof. I sat up there all day until he walked out with his sister. I hit him in the head with at least forty-five acorns. 13 I rolled down then too, but this time I didn't break my arm. I somewhat resemble juggled fruit, however. 14 nope, you're wrong. I'm not good at staying put. where am I even going? 15 gravity hurts. I'm not getting any closer. I don't know what you look like anymore. maybe I should cut my hair. it's where I carry my stress. 16 it wasn't long enough to donate. my flip-flop broke so I threw it out the car window into a ditch. you didn't know my name. but for a week there, I was really good at running. 17 shit's getting weird. a rabbit ran between my legs. maybe I should've downloaded that gps. I'm holding my keys between my knuckles. a plastic cutout of an explosive device hangs from my palm "I'm the bomb" 18 so the power's out, but only on the right. chill, it's just like that boathouse behind the meridian center-- keep your head down and your peripherals open, and you'll be fine even if you're alone and a little lonely. I found a hermit crab in a seashell. it didn't pinch me. 19 this guy really has an agenda against trains. like, a crazy-ex-boyfriend-bordering-on- crime-of-passion agenda. he makes really good mac & cheese out of the back of his pickup though, so it balances out. there's a streetlamp over the hill-- 20 nope, it was a neighborhood watch guy with a flood- light. I proved I wasn't a hooligan with my high school transcript. damn university wouldn't accept an unofficial copy and I'd never taken it out of my pants pocket. 21 I am underwater. I am everything. I have it all. my hands-- 22 they almost got me to stay. that's all I'll say. you'd think a place called paradise would have more porch swings. 23 do not park your car in Austin, Texas. no matter what you do you're wrong. 24 a dreaming dog. the way their legs kick; the way I'm kicking myself rn. bought a phony ticket. face down on the airport tile. 25 in sync. two toothbrushes by the sink. we can't seem to sink. we. ha, wow-- we. 26 but then again, everything always does seem to fall apart.
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though luck be a fuccboi tonight like a fake nail your Lightning press on americans like afternoon games hockey on the tv like gay marriage or polyamory some people are rly into it when i hear Grimes sing italiano mobster lookin so precious i cringe evidently but think of you who cut ur fangs on Angelfire in this age we’re all culturally catholic that is to say liberal minded but your grandparents’ ornate tomb should be on an aesthetic microblog i’ve known a number of people who wear large acetate frames even more be- spectacled graphic designers (ur my passion) i don’t know anyone else who listens to Pulp the only other Melvins fan was this guy in high school whom i crushed on then detested if they released a new vinyl called warpussy then we should all tag ourselves as pestilencepussy faminepussy deathpussy luck must be the latter becuz it’s all cyclical when it comes to art deco windows or vaporware ✱✱✱
i am proud of her. she used menstrual blood as war paint, smearing her face with the vengeance of a warrior. and she pranced throughout the golden coast and along the ocean’s shore, exploiting this beautiful thing called being a woman. ✱✱✱
Alyssa creates all sorts of amazing things. We've chosen to feature her Femmes & Flowers coloring book zine, but click on through to her portfolio or shop at the links below for some more wonderful work! Alyssa Giannini is a Lancaster, PA native living in Olympia, WA. Her Femmes & Flowers Coloring Book zine took over 60 hours to illustrate, proving to be the most involved zine she's worked on in her half a decade as a zinester. She is passionate about creating, caring for plants, snail mail, diy music and dad jokes. You can buy this zine and many others in her etsy shop, and check out her portfolio for a glimpse at her other work, or to commission some art. This is what the sun sounds like when it believes it will never die. How we think the moon will never fall back around. How we ease time between us like a glove off Orion’s hand. Look― even a black hole looks like two stars they can’t match to a god. The first time I heard a quasar was to hear the clock counting heartbeats and then why did you count them on your skin? Two girls trying to know each other by the joining of their hands sounds like something they will never know through telescopes. there is so much hollow in the way our fingers touch. And here, the streak across the stars that we thought had all the answers. We asked it to be our miracle, heard it breathing. I didn’t know that was the wish you never got. And there, we found it: the place where they theorized the universe was lonely because it was your voice that wandered off the walls. That is what they call comet. The way the horizon whispers when we have halfclosed ourselves to sleep. The way I went to my knees two days later when I heard the world fall, two years later I rise enough to hear it collapsing out. I swear somewhere these voices know you by name. I swear I hear you searching. I swear I hear your heart in radio waves. ✱✱✱
WHAT IS GIRL PLUS ___?"girl plus ___ is a project that aims to explore spaces & the women that live there. i started this photo series as a way to share my girl gang with the world. all of my friends were doing really incredible things, spreading light in their own way and fulfilling creative endeavors that spoke to them, and it felt like someone outside of our circle should know. it’s a cool thing to create a little corner of the internet for “your kind of people,” and then make connections beyond that. definitely something i had not taken advantage of prior to this project! i really hope that with these photos and interviews, readers/viewers can visit the world of each person, make connections, bridge the gap, and hopefully see a little bit more of their own potential in the process. what started as a fun side project has become much more purposeful, and i’d love to keep moving in that direction. as always, i’m super thankful for each visitor and whatever impact (if any) these stories have on their lives. my beginning statement has always been the most important truth of this project and i think it’s the best way to give you the gist: we embrace both the mundane & the extraordinary. each person is a tiny, incredible star in the universe. " EXCERPTS FROM GIRL + BROOKLYNhead over to http://girl--plus.com/ for more photos and interviews from brooklyn, austin, manhattan, dallas and san luis obispo. christinaat the whitney museum of art, meatpacking district, manhattan i spent my first month in new york roaming around the city aimlessly, totally solo and without a clue. enter christina: the saving grace i met one sunday after church who heaved me out of my solitude and into the frenzy that is her nyc social life. christina is currently in grad school at colombia studying arts administration, & she'll probably be running coachella and acl one day so keep an eye out for this one...she's rad. "After working as a fashion/lifestyle publicist for a couple of years, I decided I needed a change. So I went back to school. It has been amazing. I feel like I'm exploring new interests and possibilities I had never considered. I am excited about the future. However, having to do homework after thinking I was done with that part of my life can be annoying, but it's only for a short time. I'll deal." where are you from? I spent my formative years in Cincinnati, OH, but I also claim Houston, TX and Richmond, VA. It depends on who I'm talking to. what do you do? I am a graduate student at Columbia University studying Arts Administration, which is basically a nonprofit business management degree with a focus on the arts. I'm hoping to work in music festival planning and programming one day, but recently I've been obsessed with idea of working at the Brooklyn Museum or BAM. style is...mixed prints, bright colors, funky African prints. i start every morning…by checking my horoscope. If it's positive, it's like a pep talk. If not, I'm like these are all lies! Haha one thing i couldn't live without...my planner. I'm a Virgo... 3 women i admire: Erykah Badu, Solange Knowles, and Cipriana Quann of Urban Bush Babes on the basis of their style. i am most well-known for...being the social coordinator for my friends. I really enjoy bringing people together. vintage is...for mixing with new pieces. i like it when girls...can accept a compliment without feeling the need to reciprocate or deny it. It really is an art. i like it when guys...are feminists. lipstick...should be bold/make you feel bold. the best outfit i ever wore...navy loose top with white polka dots tucked into my favorite high-waisted paisley pants with black booties. I wore it to the BK Museum Artist Ball recently, and I got compliments all night long. I felt like the belle of the ball. everyday…is a new day. the best thing about Brooklyn is...diversity. Diverse neighborhoods, diverse people, and diverse things to do. I can't get enough. currently reading: White Teeth by Zadie Smith currently listening to: Mean Lady, Tei Shi, and Tennis favorite phrase or quotation: "You are who you think you can't be." i'll never forget...the day I moved to Brooklyn. August 16, 2012. i'll always...have my nose ring. I'd feel naked without it. joyat her home in greenpoint, brooklyn joy is defined as "a source or cause of keen pleasure or delight; something or someone greatly valued or appreciated; elation." i think it's safe to say that, for anyone that knows her, joy is so far living up to her name. no small feat! truly, i've never met anyone that is so full of life and laughter. it's easy to photograph someone with so much gusto and i couldn't have enjoyed my visit to her home more. thanks for having me! "I have filled my room with things that make me happy. I like to call it my Tacky Nightclub. I have weird things everywhere, pink flamingos, SNL prints, a 7’ inflatable shark, a disco ball and a whole ton of color everywhere in between. You can find wigs and costume pieces under my bed just in case there is a parade outside that I need to run out and join. It feels pretty good to wake up every morning under a disco ball. I don't want my main environment to be serious. I want to laugh and for it to feel like it’s truly me, so a jumbled mess of crazy things that somehow maybe work together. It helps me feel more creative. I like how bright it is. My mood lifts when I’m in it. My whole apartment is like that though, bright. I don't have a closet and I used to not love that all my clothes are hanging on a rack in my room, but now I love it. It’s like art, but I get to wear it everyday. My favorite thing about my place though, is the amount of people that are in it. I feel like it is a great place for friends to come and hang and laugh. I always wanted to have a place that friends want to come to and now I think I do. So come over anytime!" where are you from? Germantown Hills, Illinois. what do you do? Wardrobe for film/ tell dumb jokes. style is...whatever you feel like so that you are no longer naked i start every morning…telling myself to freakin get out of bed already Joy!! one thing i couldn't live without...deodorant (being honest here). 3 women i admire: My mom, Tina Fey, My past professor Dr. Brunson. i am most well-known for my...very loud voice…and laugh. vintage is for...everything but underwear. i like it when girls...are unafraid to tell risky jokes. i like it when guys...laugh at those jokes. lipstick...I start with it on, but somehow it never stays. the best outfit i ever wore...I have one of those very large t-shirts with a bikini painted on it, whenever I wear that and roller blades, I feel pretty damn good. everyday…I watch something that will make me laugh, most likely an SNL clip. the best thing about greenpoint is...the amount of old polish men always drinking on their stoops. currently reading: Yes Please by Amy Poehler. currently listening to: Killin the Vibe by Ducktails. favorite phrase or quotation: “Life’s short. Stunt it.” –Rod Kimble aka Hot Rod (and every other line in that movie). i’ll never...say no to ice-cream. i'll always...stop for ice-cream. tiffanyin greenpoint, brooklyn tiffany: one part production coordinator, one part editor, one part creator, all parts texan. she's a fellow austin ex-pat turned new yorker, incredibly busy 24/7, and has a funny obsession with this chris isaak music video (it's fantastic, if you were wondering). she's also the creator/editor of voyeur, a personal project that takes a look at the daily lives of people via disposable cameras, so she's no stranger to the film game. lucky us... name: Tiffany Diane Tso where are you from? Texas! what do you do? I work in production for PHHHOTO and am the Features Director for LADYGUNN Magazine. style is...better than fashion. i start every morning...by trying to bargain with my alarm clock for more sleep. one thing i couldn't live without...laughter. 3 women i admire: My grandmother, for raising six children of her own and still having the generosity to take two more in. My mother, for coming to this country without much and making a career for herself. Women writers. i am most well-known for my...disgusting humor and tiny hands. vintage is...forever. i like it when girls...are chillers. i like it when guys...are Southern. lipstick is...hard. the best outfit i ever wore...was probably patterned. everyday...is the worst/best. currently reading: I Know Why The Caged Bird Sings. currently listening: to a lot of Wiz Khalifa. favorite phrase or quotation: "From my rotting body, flowers will grow, and I am in them, and that is eternity." - Edvard Munch i’ll never...smoke cigarettes. i'll always...recycle. ✱✱✱ emma is a writer & photographer currently living in new york city.
you can see more of her work here: www.emmacbanks.com or say hi on instagram, @emmacbanks. This is a cry for the eternity of 2 minutes and 30 seconds. This is a fuck you scream to the man who used that time to hold a knife to her throat at 10 a.m. on the train, told her to go to the back, unzipped his pants and put his demon dick inside her. For 2 minutes and 30 seconds, from Wheaton to Glenmont. This is a shriek to those who dared to keep this a secret. Someone was raped here. And will that change anything? A bellow of when will it finally be enough if it’s not enough when kids in school or the Yazidi girls are kidnapped and raped. A cry of how can we expect anything to change when a man with 4 daughters only thought of her as a place for his meat. ✱✱✱
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